LISTEN WELL
Managers need to become better listeners. In fact, not only is it a good managerial skill, it’s also a key leadership skill. I firmly believe that the higher up you are in an organisation, the more listening you should do!
Listening can be really hard! All the distractions of the day clog our minds. Imagine this: You have just come out of a two-hour project meeting with lots of deadlines and complexity. Your head is swimming with thoughts about how the team will achieve their goal. Your phone buzzes in your pocket, reminding you that it’s your daughter’s first netball game that evening. You have a 1-on-1 with a direct report starting in 15 minutes, and a Zoom call immediately afterwards with a colleague in Melbourne about some client work that needs reviewing. This picture wouldn’t be too far from the reality for most managers on a busy workday.
With so much running through your head, how do you stay focused on the 1-on-1 interactions that count?
Tips to avoid distraction in 1-on-1’s:
Susan Scott (2002), in her book Fierce Conversations, states that ‘relationships either fail or succeed, slowly and then quickly, one conversation at a time.’ Value and respect your own time and that of your direct report. Don’t’ let it go to waste because of distractions.
True listening requires focus and discipline, so start by taking five minutes away from your workspace to get your thoughts in order. This might be outside in the fresh air if possible, or in a part of the building you like and can think straight in.
Now, follow these five steps:
Write a list of anything that’s on your mind. For some of us, getting it out on paper (or in electronic form) can be really useful.
Park that list. Physically remove it from your sight.
Review your last 1-on-1 with your direct report. What points/ targets/key performance indicators need to be revisited?
Think about the tone you want for the 1-on-1. How has the direct report been performing? Are there any insights or notes you have made since the last 1-on-1?
Gather your notes and head to the designated room/space for your discussion.
Managers often rush from one event in their calendars to another without stopping to catch their breath and declutter their minds. Taking five minutes out is essential for the tone of the 1-on-1 and also for your mindset. It will also allow you to be more focused and make better use of your time.
It is so important to ensure you are in the right frame of mind for a 1-on-1. If you are really so preoccupied that you can’t shake what’s in your head, then postpone the meeting. Far better to do that than to send the message to your direct report that you are not fully invested in them.
What tips and tools have helped you become a less distracted listener?